Miley: “Dad I have something for Tanners bug collection”
my uncle: “that’s great”
Miley: “it’s a bird”
my uncle: “no its not”
They let it go and it flew away just fine, so we’re wondering how she caught it.
she caught another bird.
update: she caught a squirrel today
She is gonna rule the world one day with this power
When I was a kid I thought your 20s were supposed to be fun, not filled with perpetual anxiety about financial stability and constantly feeling like an unaccomplished piece of shit.
That’s because it was fun for baby boomers and they basically gave us this impression it would always be like that, but then they ruined the economy.
I’ll respect your opinion as long as your opinion doesn’t disrespect my existence.
THIS PHRASE SHOULD BE WRITTEN EVERYWHERE AROUND THE WORLD.
I made an old lady blush today at work because she ordered two senior coffees and I said “SENIOR ? I’m sorry miss, i’m going to have to ask to see some ID.” and she covered her mouth and went “Oh dear me” and couldn’t stop smiling
the fact that there have no leaked nudes in my dashboard proves that i’m following the right people
It scares me when you stay up really late like 3am and you hear a car go down the road like where are you going
talents include looking 12 and saying thank you to the bus driver